Read and assess the three sample essays on the symbol prompt distributed in class on Friday. Comment on the strengths and weaknesses of each essay. On a scale of 1-9, what score do you think each essay earned.
Essay 1 - This essay started off good. As I continued to read it, I really had a hard time figuring out what this person was saying (because their hand writing was really messy). I think that took away from the writing itself because I had to stop and try to figure out what everything said, making it choppy. Because of that I'm not sure I can really give it a fair grade because I wasn't able to understand all of it. From what I was able to read this person seems to know what they're talking about. They used a lot of detail and examples from the text, so I would guess they probably did pretty well.
Essay 2 - I feel that this essay definitely has some good points, but it seems more like just a bunch of thoughts thrown on to a page.The introduction and thesis definitely need to be switched around a little bit. I feel like the person writing this understood the story and had a really good idea in mind, but the writing itself needed to flow a little better. I also noticed that this person did not use quotes at all. I do realize there is a time limit which makes this a lot harder, but there is definitely room for improvement. I would give this person a 5+/6-
Essay 3 - The first thing I noticed with this essay is that there are grammar issues. The title of the story is not underlined or italicized. Along with that the author's name is never mentioned. The person who wrote this essay also said "in my opinion" which I don't think is usually a good thing. Another issue with this essay is that the person wrote it in the wrong tense. The thesis is also very unclear. I really think this person did not leave them self enough time. It's a very basic paper with no real meaning. This person should have dug deeper into the meaning behind the machete. I would give them a 4.
Essay 3A- Score: 8 Overall, I thought this essay was rather successful. When I began reading this essay, I was put off by the authors some-what vague thesis. Although the student identified the wild duck as a symbol in “The Wild Duck,” he failed to relate his thesis back to the whole text, and therefor left me questioning what the important of the duck really was. That being said though, the author’s essay was much more profound than his thesis. He included interesting details and analysis about the characters and the symbols in the text. If the author’s thesis was a strong as the rest of his work, I think the essay could have been even more successful.
Essay 3B- Score 6 Overall, I thought this essay was a good start to what could have been a fantastic essay. The thesis about “A Streetcar Named Desire” was very strong and created an interesting argument. It related to the whole text, explaining that the lamp shade was used to highlight “Blanche Dubois’ obsession with youth, and her need to make everything in life appear better than it is.” Unfortunately, as the essay continued, it was not as strong as the author’s thesis. If the author had included more specific details to support her argument this would have been a much more successful essay.
Essay 3C- Score 3 Overall, this essay was not very successful. Although the thesis focused on the machete in “Things Fall Apart,” his essay provides little detail about the purpose of the machete as a symbol in the novel. The author also fails to use specific examples to back up his ideas. The conclusion was rather confusing and had little relation to the rest of the essay. Although the essay had a clear focus, the machete, that’s about all it had.
Essay 3A - Although I was slightly distracted by the handwriting because it made it difficult to read, I thought the essay was successful. I like that the writer used very specific examples and explained them thoroughly and I liked how she/he related the symbol of the duck to the entirety of the play. Though I thought the thesis statement was well written, the only thing I would change about it is that I wish the student had slightly explained what the "interesting sentiment" the reader was left with, instead of just stating that there is one. Overall, I thought this was a pretty successful essay. I would give the student an 8/8+.
Essay 3B - I thought this essay was okay, nothing special, but not too bad. The writer used details, but I do not think they were that specific. I also think it would have been better if she/he focused more on relating them to the entire purpose of the play. I did like the writers intro and conclusion, I thought both tied the whole essay in well. I am finding that its difficult to evaluate these essays without having read the book/play myself. I would give this essay a 5 or 6.
Essay 3C - I do not think this essay was very good. The intro and thesis lacked the basics that both usually have. Using "(The machete) symbolizes a higher level in power and the man who carried it was an intimidating man" as a thesis really does not explain anything. The writer should have included the symbol's relation to the book as a whole and the author's purpose. The essay then goes on to lack specific details and explanations of their importance. I think the writer could have been a lot more thorough and descriptive. I would give this essay a 3.
Essay 3A-Score 7/8 Personally, I did not initially feel hooked and interested in reading further into this essay. I also found that the thesis was somewhat vague and failed to connect to a specific purpose. However, I found the detail and specificity of the examples in this essay made it a lot stronger. This writer displays a strong knowledge of the material he is discussing and overall provides a strong argument. The writer also does a good job of transforming the duck into an important symbol.
Essay 3B-Score 5/5+ This essay begins immediately with the thesis which I found to be ineffective. There is no hook and the thesis itself seems a bit wordy and distracting. The thesis also lacks specificity. The writer lacks the ability to use specific, useful examples that relate back to the symbol of the lampshade. The overall idea is good, but I think this essay needs more analysis and organization. I also found this essay somewhat repetitive in word choice and ideas.
Essay 3C-Score 3 Initially, I noticed that this essay was unorganized in regards to the writer's ideas. The thesis also lacks to note the purpose and instead solely explains the symbol. This essay was overall very vague and a lot of the examples seemed to be somewhat irrelevant, as if the writer were just trying to fill space on the paper. The sentence structure is also choppy and there is no conclusion
Essay 3A - Aside from fact that the handwriting made it really difficult for me to understand what was going on at first, I think this essay was pretty well done. Having examples to back up the text is always a good thing because it shows that they know what they are talking about and this essay for sure demonstrated that. From what I could pick out of the text is seems to be like they covered the entire text from beginning to end had a good ending to wrap up their ideas. I would give this essay a better score if it wasn't for the fact that I couldn't read much of it, and found myself having to go back and re read because the writing was so bad. Overall I give this essay a 7+.
Essay 3B - I think this essay was alright. I liked the points that this person was trying to make but I don't think they took the right direction with this essay. They made some points, and never ran with them which is disappointing because I can see the potential in this essay. When writing an essay I think the reader should be able to get a solid idea about the reading, and this essay was a little vague and didn't seem to flow very nicely. I think it was average so I would give it a 5+/6-.
Essay 3C - I don't think this essay was done well at all. For starters it lacked a thesis which is the basis of an essay so it couldn't be set up for something greater. I found that this person repeated some things at times, especially in the intro. Another thing to point out that makes this essay unsuccessful is the lack of details to back up what they are trying to say. They seemed to just give a general summary of what was going on and didn't really dive into the text and pull out important information. Taking all of these factors into consideration I would give this essay a 3.
3A- I found this essay really hard to comprehend because of the messy writing. Aside from that, I thought that this essay contained a ton of details, and demonstrated how much knowledge the writer had about this book. I think that the thesis could have been stronger because the writer had so much knowledge and could have used it to a more direct thesis that related to the whole text. I also think at times the writer can get a little repetitive and could be more concise with his/her thoughts. Overall I thought this paper was successful. Score - 7+
3B - I personally think that this essay did not have much direction. The writer see to have a lot of knowledge about the text but had trouble organizing it cohesively in order for it to be effective. I do not think this essay was terrible but I think the writer repeats numerous times how the lamp shade is used to cover up flaws. I definitely think that he/she needs to relate the symbol to the text as a whole more and focus on the purpose of each paragraph. Although the paper did not have that much direction, he/she seems to have a good writing style. Score- 5/6
3C - I do not think that this is a well written paper. The whole text lacks purpose and a thesis statement. There are numerous grammar errors and although there is some basic knowledge of the text it seems like the writer did not dig deeper to find anything important to write about. I think that the writing style of this essay is really basic, not interesting and does not capture the readers attention. Overall, I do not think this essay is successful. Score - 3+
Essay 3A- Overall I thought this essay addressed the prompt with many specific examples. This made it easier for readers to understand the play without the writer merely summarizing the story. The thesis could have been more direct, however, with the limited time given for the essay, the author does a sufficient job of introducing the significance of the symbol. There is some awkward wording throughout the paper, but overall the thoughts are well organized. I felt the writer provided enough evidence for readers to understand the context of the play and the importance of the symbol. 7/8
Essay 3B- The first sentence of this essay is immediately distracting because it is a run-on sentence. The introduction is not very strong as well as the thesis, so it appears the essay is disorganized. At many points I felt as though the author was just recording details from the story. Along with the disorganization, the sentence structure in this paper disrupts the flow of the essay. That being said, I do feel the author has a solid understanding of the content of the book. I think the best part of this essay is the conclusion because it is concise and clear. 5+/6
Essay 3C- I think the third essay is the weakest compared to the others. The writer knew the book pretty well, but did not produce a strong argument of the machete as an important symbol. I think the main problem in this essay is that the writer did not connect the symbol to the whole text. It touches upon some of the key ideas in the novel, but does not prove the significance of symbolism. The sentence structure of this paper was not exceptional. Overall the essay is quite short, and really lacks analysis of specific details from the text. 3+/4
Essay 3A- Score:8+ There is no aspect of this essay not to like. There are specific details it is very to follow the analysis and the plot of the text. The analysis is delivered perfectly and is interesting and seems to be an in-depth analysis. Also the writing quality is fantastic(not the handwriting).
3B-Score:6 This essay does a lot of things well but just not in the same way that 3A does. There are a plethora of well described examples and it is easy to follow the analysis that is in depth and valid. However, sometimes it seems a little formulaic and there is a lack of a strong voice throughout the piece.
3C-Score:3 Simply put this essay is laking in nearly every aspect of the scoring rubric.
Essay 3B: I actually thought that the second essay was the strongest, as it had a clear thesis and had points that correlated back to the lampshade. Although there are not any quotes, there is specific evidence, such as Alan’s death and Blanche’s desire to stay young. Furthermore, the writer takes the symbol of the lampshade and provides in depth analysis that is not just surface level. Overall, I thought that it was clear and concise, while making sure to refer back to the main thesis. The reason I do not think it is a 8/9 is because it could provide more evidence and perhaps a few quotes. Grade I give it: 7
Essay 3A: While the writer does provide plenty of evidence, I was a bit unclear as to what the thesis was. Furthermore, although the writer states the the wild duck is the main symbol, I was confused as he later writes more about the dog in the third paragraph. Overall, I was a bit confused and thought that the paragraphs did not flow well together. In addition, the introduction was a bit too broad, including the thesis. While there was some implicit analysis, there was not enough explicit evidence to support the idea of why the wild duck was a symbol and what it represented. I also thought for the most part, it was summary rather than reasons for why it correlates to the wild duck. It seemed as if the symbol was a bit of an after thought. Grade I give it: 5
Essay 3C: I thought that this essay was the weakest in comparison to the other two. The writer provides a symbol to which he/she does not provide any deeper analysis rather than surface level observations of what a machete is used for. Fruthermore, there is little evidence in order to back up his/her thesis. In addition, the writer finally says what the machete represents in the last line of the essay. There is a lack of organization and the sentences do not flow well (especially in the fourth paragraph). Grade I give it: 3
Essay 3A- This essay has good development through use of supporting examples but is difficult to read and understand clearly. I found myself having to go back and re-read to fully comprehend what the writer was trying to convey. Examples were clear and concise however and did a good job of supporting main ideas. Where I liked the thesis, I wish it was explained more specifically. The "interesting sentiment" was vague and as I reader, I wish I knew what the "interesting sentiment" actually was. Overall, I believe this is a successful essay. If it were neater and possibly easier to read I would have scored it an 8+/9 but because it was such a hassle to read I give it a 7+/8
Essay 3B- This essay was okay. It didn't have anything really special or perfect about it and I didn't have any "AHA moments" while reading. I agree with others that say the opening was somewhat distracting, and the work as a whole struggled to connect to the work as a whole. I feel like the writer really knew what they were talking about and understood the text, but was unable to dig down to that higher level thinking. 4+/5
Essay 3C- This is the weakest of the three. With no real thesis, there was really no where to go in the paper. Because there is no strong thesis, there is no strong evidence to back up a non-existent idea that connects to the work as a whole. Similar to Essay 3B, I feel like the writer knew what they were talking about and was unable to reach the level of higher thinking, but this writer also struggled with grammar and tense throughout the essay. 2+/3
Essay 3A-Score 7 I did not feel like the introduction was very strong. The thesis was not very strong and really vague but yet the examples used in the essay were very specific. The writer obviously knew the book very well and there was an overall strong argument. Remembering that this was the last essay on the exam and that there was a time limit, the writer did a really good job at getting their point across to the reader. They definitely had a strong knowledge of the book.
Essay3B- Score 5+/6- When reading this essay, I got very distracted by grammatical errors. I got confused while reading the first sentence because it was a huge run on sentence. The introduction and the thesis were okay but not as strong as they could be. It seemed as though the author was just frantically inserting details of the story while writing. However, there was the sense that they did have a strong understanding of the book because their conclusion was extremely strong and really wrapped up the essay well.
Essay3C- Score 3+/4 The first thing that I noticed was that the essay didn't have a thesis. Obviously without a thesis, it is hard to get a single point across to the reader which is always the goal. There were barely any details in the essay so it seemed like the author didn't have a good understanding of the text at all. Their essay was mostly a summary of the context and the author failed to dig deeper into the book. If there was a thesis to this essay it could have been better and would have probably received a better score, but with nothing to base an argument off of, the author did a sub par job with this essay.
Essay 3A: I thought this essay was really good, it covered development and supported the main ideas. The author was able to address the importance of symbolism especially considering the time allotted. It really demonstrated how much knowledge they had about the book as well. 6+/7
Essay 3B: The overall disorganization of the paper was distracting, however I do believe the author had a clear understanding of the book based on all the detailed examples given. I feel like they just need to focus in on the purpose of each paragraph better.5-/6
Essay 3C: The author demonstrates an overall lack of deeper analysis throughout the essay, leaving what the machete actually represents for the last line. There is also no strong, clear evidence for what the author is trying to get across. 3
Essay 3A- The essay did a pretty solid job at showing the symbolism of the duck with examples and by addressing the whole text. The introduction was a little weak and vague, but it sufficed its purpose. Lastly, it was clear that the student understood the prompt and the text. 8/9
Essay 3B- Starts off with the cliche "Tennesse Williams play 'A streetcar name desire.'" The lack of apostrophe and comma also threw me off. Not a great start, the lightbulb is addressed to the whole text. The only problem is, it's addressed in a redundant way that doesn't really show any direct connections to the text. 6-/9
Essay 3C- This person understood what a symbol meant, so he gets one point for that. The machete is a symbol for power, that's another point. And he used an example of the church and one of women, that's a third point. Apart from that, terrible. 3/9
Essay 3A-Score 8 This analysis is in-depth and elaborative. The essay is organized well and concise. The only negative aspect of the essay was the thesis, which was a bit vague however within the small time limit it is acceptable.
Essay 3B- Score 5 Overall this essay had good ideas however it was not organized well and not elaborated on. The essay is very vague though it does have good examples. This essay is very repetitive but it has potential.
Essay 3C- Score 3 This paper was not written very cohesively. It lacked a strong thesis and an overall purpose. It gave a full summary of what was going on but did not show the importance of the symbol. The sentence structure, tone, and style were also lacking in this essay.
3A: I think the author of this essay definitely knew a lot of information about the play which allowed for good analysis and examples. I was initially confused by the thesis and whether or not it was good to mention the affect on the audience. In this case of a play it seems reasonable but the thesis still lacked an entire purpose. Though not provided in the thesis, the essay contained strong evidence from the text and analysis that helped prove their purpose. Overall, I was very frustrated with this essay because the handwriting was so difficult to read and that took a lot away from the piece. 7
3B: Though the author clearly knew the book, that is almost all of what I got out of it. There was lot of plot summarizing in this essay and it lacked analysis. The ideas are strong but they need more detail and organization. Though the purpose was not exactly clear, the explanation of the author's use of symbols was effective. 6
3C: Out of all the essays, this one lacked analysis and supporting evidence the most. The author is simply stating when the machete is used and does not explain its symbolism. The syntax and sentence structure in this essay is also a little distracting and not effective. Still, the author was able to provide some information from the text. Overall, though, the essay lacked a purpose. 3+
Essay 3A- This essay definitely has a lot of strong analysis that actually shows how the symbol of the duck is being used and what its purpose is. Although some parts could be more specific, other parts pay very close attention to the details of the story. The thesis touches on the symbol, the purpose of the story, and how the symbol helps illustrate this purpose. The only thing is that I thought the “how” part of the thesis could’ve been more specific. The essay also related the symbol to the whole text. Score: 7/8 Essay 3B- This essay did not include very specific details within its analysis of the symbol. There are too many grammatical errors that distract from the purpose of the essay. There is no clear thesis that includes the purpose of the play or how the symbol conveys the message. There are some parts where the analysis is specific enough, but most of the analysis “tells” rather than “shows.” Score: 4/5 Essay 3C- This essay has immature language, grammatical errors, and does a poor job of showing the purpose of the symbol in the story. It lacks enough detail to “show not tell,” and seems to just summarize the story. However, the summary isn’t even strong. There is also no clear thesis. Score: 2/3.
Essay 3A: 7+/8- (admittedly the handwriting was difficult) The essay has explicit analysis of how the duck parallels the state of "blissful ignorance" and it appears that the descriptions are accurate. It also stays on task and has some supporting details, such as the escape of the attic. However, it lacks the sophistication and complexity needed in a 9, for only a few of the parallels are explored in depth. Essay 3B: 5+/6- The essay shows some symbolic aspects of the lampshade. However, the connection is never really completed since it is composed of a bit too much summary and not clear enough elaboration. The elaboration and the examples seem to be made in isolation. (This might not be relevant, but I find the use of a lampshade as a symbol somewhat amusing). Essay 3C: 3-/3 The chosen symbol of the machete is clear, but the language is unprofessional and the analysis is somewhat distorted. There are several distracting mechanical issues, such as the use of past tense and contractions. The examples are extremely vague, to the point where the student cites "based by [sic] the book" as evidence. Finally, the machete has no complexity whatsoever, merely being a sign of "strength".
Essay 3A: 8 The author's understanding of the play enabled deep analysis into its plot. Although I found the thesis a bit weak for the essay, it is mostly forgiven due to circumstance; the author had to write the piece in a timed and unplanned session. There are a few parts that could use more specificity, but overall the author showed understanding of the text as a whole and provided good insight into the symbol of the duck. Essay 3B: 5 Unlike the first essay, Essay 3B lacked organization of ideas. It was vague with examples and did not leave the impression that the author understood the text as comprehensively as he/she could have. Overall the paper had good ideas and insights, but nothing remarkable. Essay 3C: 3 This essay lacked a strong thesis to guide the paper's purpose and organization. Because of this, there was little supporting evidence or analysis of examples. This paper really shows how not having a thesis or defined purpose for a paper can throw off the whole thing; when reading, I got the impression that the author struggled with the topic. -Olivia Mosher
Essay 3A: Score: 7-8 I think this essay provides substantial analysis regarding the symbol of the duck. The author definitely identifies the the overall purpose of the text and from what I could read clearly, expanded upon his/her ideas enough. The thesis is slightly confusing however it does cover all aspects of the prompt (the symbol, the purpose of the story, and how the symbol illustrates the purpose). Despite this, though, I think the author needs to address how the symbol reveals the overall purpose of the story. This aspect of the essay was not developed enough for it to merit a score of a 9. Essay 3B: Score: 5 The fundamental ideas behind this essay definitely have potential. The structure and organization of the essay, however, are not satisfactory. The overall tone is vague and does not focus enough on the specific examples of the story which could be used to further illuminate the purpose of the text. Essay 3C: Score: 3 Compared to the other two essays, this was definitely the least successful. Though the writer identifies a symbol he/she doesn’t elaborate enough on it at all. The analysis is very surface level, and the writing displays a lack of understanding, or perhaps regard, for a greater purpose in the text he/she was examining. The writing style also isn’t well organized or sophisticated.
Essay 1- For the most part I found this essay to provide a number good examples to support the analysis that the writer provided. I felt as though the thesis wasn't as clear as it should have been but despite that the essay was relevant to what was stated in the thesis. I found that the writer could have challenged him/herself by choosing a more complex topic. I would have to rate this essay as a 7+/8
Essay 2: Despite the good ideas this paper lacked the development that was implemented in the first essay. In many points of the essay it jumped around and I felt as though it never clearly made an in-depth analysis. The specific details were lacking and often quotes were left with little to no analysis following them. I would rate this essay as a 4+/5-
Essay 3- This essay was extremely poor compared to the two prior essays. This essay only identifies symbols but gives absolutely no analysis following them to tie back into the text. I felt as though this writing style was undeveloped and repetitive. If the writer had expanded their thoughts this essay could have potentially been better but I would have to give this essay a grade of no higher than a 3.
3A: 6+/7- This essay starts off with a decent thesis, but it could have been stronger with more of an opinion behind it. The writing style and grammar is strong throughout. However, the essay in general does support the thesis, it summarizes too much, is too generic, and does not provide enough appropriate specific examples. The writer does appear to address the entire text. Also, the thesis seems to have been strengthened, and refined in the conclusion.
3B: 5 This essay had numerous grammatical mistakes. Despite a decent thesis, the essay is again too general and does not provide enough specific evidence. It also lacks organization and clarity. The writer seems to understand the text, but does not effectively use it to support his or her thesis.
3C: 4+ This essay began with a weak thesis. It was far too short and did not have enough substance. Though it provides a few specific examples it is not enough and makes no attempt to address the whole text, and is also repetitive in places. The analysis is superficial and does not delve deeper. The grammar and style of writing is choppy and unsophisticated.
Easy 1: 7. While the author did have a solid understanding of the text as a whole, their thesis was a tad shaky. Another aspect that inhibited them from earning a 9 was that the analysis that they used could have been more direct, more explicit. Essay 2: 5. The essay was lacking in the development of ideas. The thesis, while semi decent, was somewhat muddled, and the numerous grammatical errors detracted from the essay as a whole. Essay 3: 4. For what the essay lacked in analysis and specific use of the text, it tried to recuperate in summarization, resulting in a vague, brief piece that didn't effectivly address the text as a whole.
Essay 3A: 7 There was a great overall understanding of the text and the author did an excellent job demonstrating that. I think the thesis was one of the weaker parts of the essay which is unfortunate, and evidence and explaining could have been a little stronger, but over all it was very good. Essay 3B: 5 While the ideas had were good they needed to be expounded upon further. I found the mechanics of the essay to be the weakest part which also brought the grade down a serious amount. The essay had good foundations but needed to be worked more. Essay 3C: 4 Of all the essays I found this one to be the weakest overall. The mechanics and ideas were equally unsatisfactory. Their needed to be more textual evidence and better grammar.
3A- 7 This essay is the strongest of the three. What makes this essay successful is that not only does it connect the symbol of the duck to the whole text, it also employs specific textual evidence. It is evident that the writer has a strong grasp of the play and is sure in their ideas and organization. What limits this score is a weaker thesis, which is too vague to be credible. 3B- 5 While this essay has potential, it fails to employ strong evidence from the text to fully support the thesis. If there had been more significant and specific details involved in the analysis this score would be much higher. It also lacked strong organization and structure. 3C- 3 This essay is strewn with mechanical errors, which detract from the integrity of it as a whole. Overall, there is not enough supporting evidence to convince me that the writer has a strong grasp of the novel. Analysis is also far to shallow, failing to answer the question "so what?"
Essay 1: 7+/8- This essay was fairly strong and it directly addressed the use of rhe duck as a symbol. The essay references he text and has adequate cotext to provide an understanding of the symbol. The thesis is stong, but could be strengthened by rewording the last part that says "leaving his audience with interesting sentiment." It seems to reference the whole text, but is not deserving of a 9 because the thesis needs strengthening and the analysis could be expanded.
Essay 2: 5 This essay deserves a 5 because although it has a good idea and shows a general understanding of the text, it fails to provide complex analysis and is wrought with grammatical errors. It uses a symbol that could potentially yield a good essay, but the thesis is vague and so is the rest of the essay.
Essay 3: 3+/4- The essay presents a symbol and a basic idea but lacks complexity on all levels. The syntax is simple and the idea is not expanded upon. The writer understands the machete as a symbol but fails to explain why it matters, "so what" and does not reference the whole text or give adequate context or analysis.
Essay 1: I think this essay is quite well organized, but a little wordy at times. The style is quite nice (clear and coherent) but a little casual and summarized slightly too much every once in a while. I think this essay does a pretty good job using the whole text, but I have not read The Wild Duck, so I can't be sure. I can see that the author uses examples chronologically though. I think this essay could use a bit more analysis, but overall it is concise and follows the rubric so I'm giving it a 7+.
Essay 2: The thesis in this essay is a little rocky, as it relies on the sentence before it to make sense.(I suppose this is fine but I think it could be a little clearer). Though the writing is simple, it does succeed in defining and proving a purpose. However the author is often repetitive where they really should be providing deeper analysis, so I'm giving this essay a 6-.
Essay 3: The writing style here is choppy and repetitive. It's too casual for this type of essay as well. This essay is not complex, and as a result, the analysis is not as deep as it should be. I think this essay could use some major doctoring where the style and content is concerned, so I'm giving this essay a 3+
Essay 1: The author clearly understood the nuances of the text and presented their argument in the most sophisticated manner out of all the essays. The handwriting detracted from the essay as it was difficult to read and the overall organization could have been better. But overall a complex and coherent essay. Score: 7
Essay 2: This essay demonstrates sufficient knowledge of the text, however they relied primarily on generalizations rather than on specific evidence. There were a few distracting grammatical errors but nothing major. Score: 6
Essay 3: This essay clearly identifies a symbol but lacks complexity in their argument. There is a lack of evidence and does not demonstrate a sufficient understanding of the novel. Additionally there were many mechanical errors. Score: 4
Here is the write up from the College Board. The score report is on the last page of the pdf.: http://apcentral.collegeboard.com/apc/public/repository/ap09_english_lit_q3.pdf
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ReplyDeleteEssay 1 - This essay started off good. As I continued to read it, I really had a hard time figuring out what this person was saying (because their hand writing was really messy). I think that took away from the writing itself because I had to stop and try to figure out what everything said, making it choppy. Because of that I'm not sure I can really give it a fair grade because I wasn't able to understand all of it. From what I was able to read this person seems to know what they're talking about. They used a lot of detail and examples from the text, so I would guess they probably did pretty well.
ReplyDeleteEssay 2 - I feel that this essay definitely has some good points, but it seems more like just a bunch of thoughts thrown on to a page.The introduction and thesis definitely need to be switched around a little bit. I feel like the person writing this understood the story and had a really good idea in mind, but the writing itself needed to flow a little better. I also noticed that this person did not use quotes at all. I do realize there is a time limit which makes this a lot harder, but there is definitely room for improvement. I would give this person a 5+/6-
Essay 3 - The first thing I noticed with this essay is that there are grammar issues. The title of the story is not underlined or italicized. Along with that the author's name is never mentioned. The person who wrote this essay also said "in my opinion" which I don't think is usually a good thing. Another issue with this essay is that the person wrote it in the wrong tense. The thesis is also very unclear. I really think this person did not leave them self enough time. It's a very basic paper with no real meaning. This person should have dug deeper into the meaning behind the machete. I would give them a 4.
Essay 3A- Score: 8
ReplyDeleteOverall, I thought this essay was rather successful. When I began reading this essay, I was put off by the authors some-what vague thesis. Although the student identified the wild duck as a symbol in “The Wild Duck,” he failed to relate his thesis back to the whole text, and therefor left me questioning what the important of the duck really was. That being said though, the author’s essay was much more profound than his thesis. He included interesting details and analysis about the characters and the symbols in the text. If the author’s thesis was a strong as the rest of his work, I think the essay could have been even more successful.
Essay 3B- Score 6
Overall, I thought this essay was a good start to what could have been a fantastic essay. The thesis about “A Streetcar Named Desire” was very strong and created an interesting argument. It related to the whole text, explaining that the lamp shade was used to highlight “Blanche Dubois’ obsession with youth, and her need to make everything in life appear better than it is.” Unfortunately, as the essay continued, it was not as strong as the author’s thesis. If the author had included more specific details to support her argument this would have been a much more successful essay.
Essay 3C- Score 3
Overall, this essay was not very successful. Although the thesis focused on the machete in “Things Fall Apart,” his essay provides little detail about the purpose of the machete as a symbol in the novel. The author also fails to use specific examples to back up his ideas. The conclusion was rather confusing and had little relation to the rest of the essay. Although the essay had a clear focus, the machete, that’s about all it had.
Essay 3A - Although I was slightly distracted by the handwriting because it made it difficult to read, I thought the essay was successful. I like that the writer used very specific examples and explained them thoroughly and I liked how she/he related the symbol of the duck to the entirety of the play. Though I thought the thesis statement was well written, the only thing I would change about it is that I wish the student had slightly explained what the "interesting sentiment" the reader was left with, instead of just stating that there is one. Overall, I thought this was a pretty successful essay. I would give the student an 8/8+.
ReplyDeleteEssay 3B - I thought this essay was okay, nothing special, but not too bad. The writer used details, but I do not think they were that specific. I also think it would have been better if she/he focused more on relating them to the entire purpose of the play. I did like the writers intro and conclusion, I thought both tied the whole essay in well. I am finding that its difficult to evaluate these essays without having read the book/play myself. I would give this essay a 5 or 6.
Essay 3C - I do not think this essay was very good. The intro and thesis lacked the basics that both usually have. Using "(The machete) symbolizes a higher level in power and the man who carried it was an intimidating man" as a thesis really does not explain anything. The writer should have included the symbol's relation to the book as a whole and the author's purpose. The essay then goes on to lack specific details and explanations of their importance. I think the writer could have been a lot more thorough and descriptive. I would give this essay a 3.
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ReplyDeleteEssay 3A-Score 7/8
ReplyDeletePersonally, I did not initially feel hooked and interested in reading further into this essay. I also found that the thesis was somewhat vague and failed to connect to a specific purpose. However, I found the detail and specificity of the examples in this essay made it a lot stronger. This writer displays a strong knowledge of the material he is discussing and overall provides a strong argument. The writer also does a good job of transforming the duck into an important symbol.
Essay 3B-Score 5/5+
This essay begins immediately with the thesis which I found to be ineffective. There is no hook and the thesis itself seems a bit wordy and distracting. The thesis also lacks specificity. The writer lacks the ability to use specific, useful examples that relate back to the symbol of the lampshade. The overall idea is good, but I think this essay needs more analysis and organization. I also found this essay somewhat repetitive in word choice and ideas.
Essay 3C-Score 3
Initially, I noticed that this essay was unorganized in regards to the writer's ideas. The thesis also lacks to note the purpose and instead solely explains the symbol. This essay was overall very vague and a lot of the examples seemed to be somewhat irrelevant, as if the writer were just trying to fill space on the paper. The sentence structure is also choppy and there is no conclusion
Essay 3A - Aside from fact that the handwriting made it really difficult for me to understand what was going on at first, I think this essay was pretty well done. Having examples to back up the text is always a good thing because it shows that they know what they are talking about and this essay for sure demonstrated that. From what I could pick out of the text is seems to be like they covered the entire text from beginning to end had a good ending to wrap up their ideas. I would give this essay a better score if it wasn't for the fact that I couldn't read much of it, and found myself having to go back and re read because the writing was so bad. Overall I give this essay a 7+.
ReplyDeleteEssay 3B - I think this essay was alright. I liked the points that this person was trying to make but I don't think they took the right direction with this essay. They made some points, and never ran with them which is disappointing because I can see the potential in this essay. When writing an essay I think the reader should be able to get a solid idea about the reading, and this essay was a little vague and didn't seem to flow very nicely. I think it was average so I would give it a 5+/6-.
Essay 3C - I don't think this essay was done well at all. For starters it lacked a thesis which is the basis of an essay so it couldn't be set up for something greater. I found that this person repeated some things at times, especially in the intro. Another thing to point out that makes this essay unsuccessful is the lack of details to back up what they are trying to say. They seemed to just give a general summary of what was going on and didn't really dive into the text and pull out important information. Taking all of these factors into consideration I would give this essay a 3.
3A- I found this essay really hard to comprehend because of the messy writing. Aside from that, I thought that this essay contained a ton of details, and demonstrated how much knowledge the writer had about this book. I think that the thesis could have been stronger because the writer had so much knowledge and could have used it to a more direct thesis that related to the whole text. I also think at times the writer can get a little repetitive and could be more concise with his/her thoughts. Overall I thought this paper was successful. Score - 7+
ReplyDelete3B - I personally think that this essay did not have much direction. The writer see to have a lot of knowledge about the text but had trouble organizing it cohesively in order for it to be effective. I do not think this essay was terrible but I think the writer repeats numerous times how the lamp shade is used to cover up flaws. I definitely think that he/she needs to relate the symbol to the text as a whole more and focus on the purpose of each paragraph. Although the paper did not have that much direction, he/she seems to have a good writing style. Score- 5/6
3C - I do not think that this is a well written paper. The whole text lacks purpose and a thesis statement. There are numerous grammar errors and although there is some basic knowledge of the text it seems like the writer did not dig deeper to find anything important to write about. I think that the writing style of this essay is really basic, not interesting and does not capture the readers attention. Overall, I do not think this essay is successful. Score - 3+
Essay 3A- Overall I thought this essay addressed the prompt with many specific examples. This made it easier for readers to understand the play without the writer merely summarizing the story. The thesis could have been more direct, however, with the limited time given for the essay, the author does a sufficient job of introducing the significance of the symbol. There is some awkward wording throughout the paper, but overall the thoughts are well organized. I felt the writer provided enough evidence for readers to understand the context of the play and the importance of the symbol. 7/8
ReplyDeleteEssay 3B- The first sentence of this essay is immediately distracting because it is a run-on sentence. The introduction is not very strong as well as the thesis, so it appears the essay is disorganized. At many points I felt as though the author was just recording details from the story. Along with the disorganization, the sentence structure in this paper disrupts the flow of the essay. That being said, I do feel the author has a solid understanding of the content of the book. I think the best part of this essay is the conclusion because it is concise and clear. 5+/6
Essay 3C- I think the third essay is the weakest compared to the others. The writer knew the book pretty well, but did not produce a strong argument of the machete as an important symbol. I think the main problem in this essay is that the writer did not connect the symbol to the whole text. It touches upon some of the key ideas in the novel, but does not prove the significance of symbolism. The sentence structure of this paper was not exceptional. Overall the essay is quite short, and really lacks analysis of specific details from the text. 3+/4
Essay 3A- Score:8+
ReplyDeleteThere is no aspect of this essay not to like. There are specific details it is very to follow the analysis and the plot of the text. The analysis is delivered perfectly and is interesting and seems to be an in-depth analysis. Also the writing quality is fantastic(not the handwriting).
3B-Score:6
This essay does a lot of things well but just not in the same way that 3A does. There are a plethora of well described examples and it is easy to follow the analysis that is in depth and valid. However, sometimes it seems a little formulaic and there is a lack of a strong voice throughout the piece.
3C-Score:3
Simply put this essay is laking in nearly every aspect of the scoring rubric.
Essay 3B: I actually thought that the second essay was the strongest, as it had a clear thesis and had points that correlated back to the lampshade. Although there are not any quotes, there is specific evidence, such as Alan’s death and Blanche’s desire to stay young. Furthermore, the writer takes the symbol of the lampshade and provides in depth analysis that is not just surface level. Overall, I thought that it was clear and concise, while making sure to refer back to the main thesis. The reason I do not think it is a 8/9 is because it could provide more evidence and perhaps a few quotes. Grade I give it: 7
ReplyDeleteEssay 3A: While the writer does provide plenty of evidence, I was a bit unclear as to what the thesis was. Furthermore, although the writer states the the wild duck is the main symbol, I was confused as he later writes more about the dog in the third paragraph. Overall, I was a bit confused and thought that the paragraphs did not flow well together. In addition, the introduction was a bit too broad, including the thesis. While there was some implicit analysis, there was not enough explicit evidence to support the idea of why the wild duck was a symbol and what it represented. I also thought for the most part, it was summary rather than reasons for why it correlates to the wild duck. It seemed as if the symbol was a bit of an after thought. Grade I give it: 5
Essay 3C: I thought that this essay was the weakest in comparison to the other two. The writer provides a symbol to which he/she does not provide any deeper analysis rather than surface level observations of what a machete is used for. Fruthermore, there is little evidence in order to back up his/her thesis. In addition, the writer finally says what the machete represents in the last line of the essay. There is a lack of organization and the sentences do not flow well (especially in the fourth paragraph). Grade I give it: 3
Essay 3A- This essay has good development through use of supporting examples but is difficult to read and understand clearly. I found myself having to go back and re-read to fully comprehend what the writer was trying to convey. Examples were clear and concise however and did a good job of supporting main ideas. Where I liked the thesis, I wish it was explained more specifically. The "interesting sentiment" was vague and as I reader, I wish I knew what the "interesting sentiment" actually was. Overall, I believe this is a successful essay. If it were neater and possibly easier to read I would have scored it an 8+/9 but because it was such a hassle to read I give it a 7+/8
ReplyDeleteEssay 3B- This essay was okay. It didn't have anything really special or perfect about it and I didn't have any "AHA moments" while reading. I agree with others that say the opening was somewhat distracting, and the work as a whole struggled to connect to the work as a whole. I feel like the writer really knew what they were talking about and understood the text, but was unable to dig down to that higher level thinking. 4+/5
Essay 3C- This is the weakest of the three. With no real thesis, there was really no where to go in the paper. Because there is no strong thesis, there is no strong evidence to back up a non-existent idea that connects to the work as a whole. Similar to Essay 3B, I feel like the writer knew what they were talking about and was unable to reach the level of higher thinking, but this writer also struggled with grammar and tense throughout the essay. 2+/3
Essay 3A-Score 7
ReplyDeleteI did not feel like the introduction was very strong. The thesis was not very strong and really vague but yet the examples used in the essay were very specific. The writer obviously knew the book very well and there was an overall strong argument. Remembering that this was the last essay on the exam and that there was a time limit, the writer did a really good job at getting their point across to the reader. They definitely had a strong knowledge of the book.
Essay3B- Score 5+/6-
When reading this essay, I got very distracted by grammatical errors. I got confused while reading the first sentence because it was a huge run on sentence. The introduction and the thesis were okay but not as strong as they could be. It seemed as though the author was just frantically inserting details of the story while writing. However, there was the sense that they did have a strong understanding of the book because their conclusion was extremely strong and really wrapped up the essay well.
Essay3C- Score 3+/4
The first thing that I noticed was that the essay didn't have a thesis. Obviously without a thesis, it is hard to get a single point across to the reader which is always the goal. There were barely any details in the essay so it seemed like the author didn't have a good understanding of the text at all. Their essay was mostly a summary of the context and the author failed to dig deeper into the book. If there was a thesis to this essay it could have been better and would have probably received a better score, but with nothing to base an argument off of, the author did a sub par job with this essay.
Essay 3A: I thought this essay was really good, it covered development and supported the main ideas. The author was able to address the importance of symbolism especially considering the time allotted. It really demonstrated how much knowledge they had about the book as well. 6+/7
ReplyDeleteEssay 3B: The overall disorganization of the paper was distracting, however I do believe the author had a clear understanding of the book based on all the detailed examples given. I feel like they just need to focus in on the purpose of each paragraph better.5-/6
Essay 3C: The author demonstrates an overall lack of deeper analysis throughout the essay, leaving what the machete actually represents for the last line. There is also no strong, clear evidence for what the author is trying to get across. 3
Essay 3A- The essay did a pretty solid job at showing the symbolism of the duck with examples and by addressing the whole text. The introduction was a little weak and vague, but it sufficed its purpose. Lastly, it was clear that the student understood the prompt and the text. 8/9
ReplyDeleteEssay 3B- Starts off with the cliche "Tennesse Williams play 'A streetcar name desire.'" The lack of apostrophe and comma also threw me off. Not a great start, the lightbulb is addressed to the whole text. The only problem is, it's addressed in a redundant way that doesn't really show any direct connections to the text. 6-/9
Essay 3C- This person understood what a symbol meant, so he gets one point for that. The machete is a symbol for power, that's another point. And he used an example of the church and one of women, that's a third point. Apart from that, terrible. 3/9
Essay 3A-Score 8
ReplyDeleteThis analysis is in-depth and elaborative. The essay is organized well and concise. The only negative aspect of the essay was the thesis, which was a bit vague however within the small time limit it is acceptable.
Essay 3B- Score 5
Overall this essay had good ideas however it was not organized well and not elaborated on. The essay is very vague though it does have good examples. This essay is very repetitive but it has potential.
Essay 3C- Score 3
This paper was not written very cohesively. It lacked a strong thesis and an overall purpose. It gave a full summary of what was going on but did not show the importance of the symbol. The sentence structure, tone, and style were also lacking in this essay.
3A: I think the author of this essay definitely knew a lot of information about the play which allowed for good analysis and examples. I was initially confused by the thesis and whether or not it was good to mention the affect on the audience. In this case of a play it seems reasonable but the thesis still lacked an entire purpose. Though not provided in the thesis, the essay contained strong evidence from the text and analysis that helped prove their purpose. Overall, I was very frustrated with this essay because the handwriting was so difficult to read and that took a lot away from the piece. 7
ReplyDelete3B: Though the author clearly knew the book, that is almost all of what I got out of it. There was lot of plot summarizing in this essay and it lacked analysis. The ideas are strong but they need more detail and organization. Though the purpose was not exactly clear, the explanation of the author's use of symbols was effective. 6
3C: Out of all the essays, this one lacked analysis and supporting evidence the most. The author is simply stating when the machete is used and does not explain its symbolism. The syntax and sentence structure in this essay is also a little distracting and not effective. Still, the author was able to provide some information from the text. Overall, though, the essay lacked a purpose. 3+
Essay 3A- This essay definitely has a lot of strong analysis that actually shows how the symbol of the duck is being used and what its purpose is. Although some parts could be more specific, other parts pay very close attention to the details of the story. The thesis touches on the symbol, the purpose of the story, and how the symbol helps illustrate this purpose. The only thing is that I thought the “how” part of the thesis could’ve been more specific. The essay also related the symbol to the whole text. Score: 7/8
ReplyDeleteEssay 3B- This essay did not include very specific details within its analysis of the symbol. There are too many grammatical errors that distract from the purpose of the essay. There is no clear thesis that includes the purpose of the play or how the symbol conveys the message. There are some parts where the analysis is specific enough, but most of the analysis “tells” rather than “shows.” Score: 4/5
Essay 3C- This essay has immature language, grammatical errors, and does a poor job of showing the purpose of the symbol in the story. It lacks enough detail to “show not tell,” and seems to just summarize the story. However, the summary isn’t even strong. There is also no clear thesis. Score: 2/3.
Essay 3A: 7+/8- (admittedly the handwriting was difficult)
ReplyDeleteThe essay has explicit analysis of how the duck parallels the state of "blissful ignorance" and it appears that the descriptions are accurate. It also stays on task and has some supporting details, such as the escape of the attic. However, it lacks the sophistication and complexity needed in a 9, for only a few of the parallels are explored in depth.
Essay 3B: 5+/6-
The essay shows some symbolic aspects of the lampshade. However, the connection is never really completed since it is composed of a bit too much summary and not clear enough elaboration. The elaboration and the examples seem to be made in isolation. (This might not be relevant, but I find the use of a lampshade as a symbol somewhat amusing).
Essay 3C: 3-/3
The chosen symbol of the machete is clear, but the language is unprofessional and the analysis is somewhat distorted. There are several distracting mechanical issues, such as the use of past tense and contractions. The examples are extremely vague, to the point where the student cites "based by [sic] the book" as evidence. Finally, the machete has no complexity whatsoever, merely being a sign of "strength".
Essay 3A: 8
ReplyDeleteThe author's understanding of the play enabled deep analysis into its plot. Although I found the thesis a bit weak for the essay, it is mostly forgiven due to circumstance; the author had to write the piece in a timed and unplanned session. There are a few parts that could use more specificity, but overall the author showed understanding of the text as a whole and provided good insight into the symbol of the duck.
Essay 3B: 5
Unlike the first essay, Essay 3B lacked organization of ideas. It was vague with examples and did not leave the impression that the author understood the text as comprehensively as he/she could have. Overall the paper had good ideas and insights, but nothing remarkable.
Essay 3C: 3
This essay lacked a strong thesis to guide the paper's purpose and organization. Because of this, there was little supporting evidence or analysis of examples. This paper really shows how not having a thesis or defined purpose for a paper can throw off the whole thing; when reading, I got the impression that the author struggled with the topic.
-Olivia Mosher
Essay 3A:
ReplyDeleteScore: 7-8
I think this essay provides substantial analysis regarding the symbol of the duck. The author definitely identifies the the overall purpose of the text and from what I could read clearly, expanded upon his/her ideas enough. The thesis is slightly confusing however it does cover all aspects of the prompt (the symbol, the purpose of the story, and how the symbol illustrates the purpose). Despite this, though, I think the author needs to address how the symbol reveals the overall purpose of the story. This aspect of the essay was not developed enough for it to merit a score of a 9.
Essay 3B:
Score: 5
The fundamental ideas behind this essay definitely have potential. The structure and organization of the essay, however, are not satisfactory. The overall tone is vague and does not focus enough on the specific examples of the story which could be used to further illuminate the purpose of the text.
Essay 3C:
Score: 3
Compared to the other two essays, this was definitely the least successful. Though the writer identifies a symbol he/she doesn’t elaborate enough on it at all. The analysis is very surface level, and the writing displays a lack of understanding, or perhaps regard, for a greater purpose in the text he/she was examining. The writing style also isn’t well organized or sophisticated.
Essay 1- For the most part I found this essay to provide a number good examples to support the analysis that the writer provided. I felt as though the thesis wasn't as clear as it should have been but despite that the essay was relevant to what was stated in the thesis. I found that the writer could have challenged him/herself by choosing a more complex topic. I would have to rate this essay as a 7+/8
ReplyDeleteEssay 2: Despite the good ideas this paper lacked the development that was implemented in the first essay. In many points of the essay it jumped around and I felt as though it never clearly made an in-depth analysis. The specific details were lacking and often quotes were left with little to no analysis following them. I would rate this essay as a 4+/5-
Essay 3- This essay was extremely poor compared to the two prior essays. This essay only identifies symbols but gives absolutely no analysis following them to tie back into the text. I felt as though this writing style was undeveloped and repetitive. If the writer had expanded their thoughts this essay could have potentially been better but I would have to give this essay a grade of no higher than a 3.
3A: 6+/7-
ReplyDeleteThis essay starts off with a decent thesis, but it could have been stronger with more of an opinion behind it. The writing style and grammar is strong throughout. However, the essay in general does support the thesis, it summarizes too much, is too generic, and does not provide enough appropriate specific examples. The writer does appear to address the entire text. Also, the thesis seems to have been strengthened, and refined in the conclusion.
3B: 5
This essay had numerous grammatical mistakes. Despite a decent thesis, the essay is again too general and does not provide enough specific evidence. It also lacks organization and clarity. The writer seems to understand the text, but does not effectively use it to support his or her thesis.
3C: 4+
This essay began with a weak thesis. It was far too short and did not have enough substance. Though it provides a few specific examples it is not enough and makes no attempt to address the whole text, and is also repetitive in places. The analysis is superficial and does not delve deeper. The grammar and style of writing is choppy and unsophisticated.
Easy 1: 7. While the author did have a solid understanding of the text as a whole, their thesis was a tad shaky. Another aspect that inhibited them from earning a 9 was that the analysis that they used could have been more direct, more explicit.
ReplyDeleteEssay 2: 5. The essay was lacking in the development of ideas. The thesis, while semi decent, was somewhat muddled, and the numerous grammatical errors detracted from the essay as a whole.
Essay 3: 4. For what the essay lacked in analysis and specific use of the text, it tried to recuperate in summarization, resulting in a vague, brief piece that didn't effectivly address the text as a whole.
Essay 3A: 7
ReplyDeleteThere was a great overall understanding of the text and the author did an excellent job demonstrating that. I think the thesis was one of the weaker parts of the essay which is unfortunate, and evidence and explaining could have been a little stronger, but over all it was very good.
Essay 3B: 5
While the ideas had were good they needed to be expounded upon further. I found the mechanics of the essay to be the weakest part which also brought the grade down a serious amount. The essay had good foundations but needed to be worked more.
Essay 3C: 4
Of all the essays I found this one to be the weakest overall. The mechanics and ideas were equally unsatisfactory. Their needed to be more textual evidence and better grammar.
3A- 7
ReplyDeleteThis essay is the strongest of the three. What makes this essay successful is that not only does it connect the symbol of the duck to the whole text, it also employs specific textual evidence. It is evident that the writer has a strong grasp of the play and is sure in their ideas and organization. What limits this score is a weaker thesis, which is too vague to be credible.
3B- 5
While this essay has potential, it fails to employ strong evidence from the text to fully support the thesis. If there had been more significant and specific details involved in the analysis this score would be much higher. It also lacked strong organization and structure.
3C- 3
This essay is strewn with mechanical errors, which detract from the integrity of it as a whole. Overall, there is not enough supporting evidence to convince me that the writer has a strong grasp of the novel. Analysis is also far to shallow, failing to answer the question "so what?"
Essay 1: 7+/8-
ReplyDeleteThis essay was fairly strong and it directly addressed the use of rhe duck as a symbol. The essay references he text and has adequate cotext to provide an understanding of the symbol. The thesis is stong, but could be strengthened by rewording the last part that says "leaving his audience with interesting sentiment." It seems to reference the whole text, but is not deserving of a 9 because the thesis needs strengthening and the analysis could be expanded.
Essay 2: 5
This essay deserves a 5 because although it has a good idea and shows a general understanding of the text, it fails to provide complex analysis and is wrought with grammatical errors. It uses a symbol that could potentially yield a good essay, but the thesis is vague and so is the rest of the essay.
Essay 3: 3+/4-
The essay presents a symbol and a basic idea but lacks complexity on all levels. The syntax is simple and the idea is not expanded upon. The writer understands the machete as a symbol but fails to explain why it matters, "so what" and does not reference the whole text or give adequate context or analysis.
Essay 1:
ReplyDeleteI think this essay is quite well organized, but a little wordy at times. The style is quite nice (clear and coherent) but a little casual and summarized slightly too much every once in a while. I think this essay does a pretty good job using the whole text, but I have not read The Wild Duck, so I can't be sure. I can see that the author uses examples chronologically though.
I think this essay could use a bit more analysis, but overall it is concise and follows the rubric so I'm giving it a 7+.
Essay 2:
The thesis in this essay is a little rocky, as it relies on the sentence before it to make sense.(I suppose this is fine but I think it could be a little clearer). Though the writing is simple, it does succeed in defining and proving a purpose. However the author is often repetitive where they really should be providing deeper analysis, so I'm giving this essay a 6-.
Essay 3:
The writing style here is choppy and repetitive. It's too casual for this type of essay as well. This essay is not complex, and as a result, the analysis is not as deep as it should be. I think this essay could use some major doctoring where the style and content is concerned, so I'm giving this essay a 3+
Essay 1: The author clearly understood the nuances of the text and presented their argument in the most sophisticated manner out of all the essays. The handwriting detracted from the essay as it was difficult to read and the overall organization could have been better. But overall a complex and coherent essay. Score: 7
ReplyDeleteEssay 2: This essay demonstrates sufficient knowledge of the text, however they relied primarily on generalizations rather than on specific evidence. There were a few distracting grammatical errors but nothing major. Score: 6
Essay 3: This essay clearly identifies a symbol but lacks complexity in their argument. There is a lack of evidence and does not demonstrate a sufficient understanding of the novel. Additionally there were many mechanical errors. Score: 4
Here is the write up from the College Board. The score report is on the last page of the pdf.: http://apcentral.collegeboard.com/apc/public/repository/ap09_english_lit_q3.pdf
ReplyDelete